delirious

It came as a surprise, no, a shock! I lifted the telephone receiver expecting to hear a friend's voice, instead, it was the voice of a stranger. Oh, but it was a wonderful stranger, indeed; it was in fact, the voice of my angel. And she was telling me I got accepted as one of the ten fellows in the Barlaya Writing Workshop.

My mind was reeling; I actually couldn't concentrate on what she was telling me. She congratulated me, told me to wait for more details about the venue of the workshop, and I think I did manage to say thank you for the great news.

And when I have finally put the phone down, I screamed in delirious happiness! Aaaaahhhhh!!! I made the cut...I did it...thank you God! I have not felt this ecstatic about something for the longest time. My husband asked me what's wrong, and I gave him a tight hug and cried, "I'm so happy." He must have thought I was crazy or weird. I felt weird. Happy-weird.

And then, I remembered this line from Sarah Ban Breathnach's book, "Simple Abundance":

"Desire, Ask, Believe, Receive" - Stella Terrill Mann

It is how we should pray, she said. I have asked Him to show me where I need to be...what I need to do...and serendipitously, I was lead to this workshop. It took me a little under a week to prepare the final manuscript, but the seed of the story had been germinating inside my brain for more than three years. It was just waiting for the right moment. Intially, I was scared to write it. It was a story that I really nurtured and wanted to publish. I was terrified that it would get torn into pieces by the critics. And yet, my heart knew it was time to let go, "If not now, when?"

As I saw it on print for the first time, I believed it was good. And when I submitted the manuscript, I hoped it would be good enough. And when I got that call, I knew it was.

"Dare yourself to believe in your creativity, wherever it may lead you. Trust that where it leads is exactly where you're supposed to be." - Sarah Ban Breathnach