the new lifetime reading plan
"...they enlarge you...they act like a developing fluid on film...they bring into consciousness what you didn't know you knew...even more than tools of self-enhancement, they are tools of self-discovery..."
"A great book is often such a midwife, delivering to the light what has been coiled like an embryo in the dark depths of the brain."
I found this entry in one of my old journals. I did not write where I got the quote and for the life of me, I could not remember either. (Whoever you are, thank you for writing it.)
I, for one, truly believe it. I love books! I love reading all kinds of books. My perfect day begins and ends with a good read. (I mean, isn't it obvious?)
But more than that, one of my deepest secret wish is to write one. Of course, you have to start somewhere, right. And one book is a good start. Now, if only I could decide what to write?
In the meantime, here's an essay I wrote, which, unfortunately didn't make it in print. Enjoy!
---
THE ESSENTIAL READING GUIDE FOR A WOMAN’S JOURNEY IN LIFE
Recently, I took a poll among my girlfriends. I asked them: “When was the last time you read something for pleasure?” One or two said “A week ago,” another said “Last month,” but most of them fall in the category, “I don’t remember anymore.”
Reading is such a luxury nowadays, at least, for us, women. Mothers, most especially. It does not matter whether one works in a corporate setting or at home, mothers, barely, have the energy nor the time to sit down and read a novel.
I remember, when my eldest child was just a few months old, I tried to finish “The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers” before the movie was shown in the theaters. (I have finished reading “The Fellowship of the Ring” when I was still pregnant.) I would pick up the book when he was taking a nap, read a few pages, put it down when he woke up to feed him, forget about the book until after he has slept at night, by then I could only read a few sentences because I was so exhausted from the day’s work.
For mothers like me, reading a book is an activity that is written at the bottom of our long list of to-dos, if at all. However, I believe it should not be so. In my opinion, one should not stop learning as we go through life, and thus, one should not stop reading. Yes, reading the newspaper headlines or the comics also count, but do not neglect “literature”: novels, short stories, poetry, essays.
Reading the classics, like Jane Austen’s “Pride and Prejudice” or Charles Dicken’s “A Tale of Two Cities” or Nick Joaquin’s “Manila”, often gives us a glimpse of the past, the roots of our society, of our human brethren.
Reading fantasy or science fiction books may sometimes tickle our fantasies about the future or a world created in the author’s imagination like Isaac Asimov’s “Foundation’s Edge” or J.R.R. Tolkien’s “The Hobbit”.
Reading gives us confirmation, imagination and revolution.
Revolution? Yes, there are books that inspire me, push me further in my explorations, dare me beyond the limits I have put on myself. These books create a ‘personal revolution’ inside me. They test my deep-seated beliefs about relationships, its temporal nature; about love, its constancy and mystery; about faith and the true meaning of our lives.
In my life’s journey, I have come to rely upon ‘a few trusted friends’, a few good books that I have always loved to read again and again, which have helped me, in one way or another, sort out my mixed-up feelings about motherhood and being a woman, or brought answers to questions I did not even know I was searching for, or opened new doors of understanding the world in which I live in.
Marianne Williamson’s “A Woman’s Worth” is a book I wished I had read when I was in my twenties, at a time when I was confused about my own worth, especially around men. It would have saved me from making a few mistakes about my relationships with men and other women. It would have reassured me that the struggle, the pain, was necessary in my evolution from a ‘princess’ to a ‘glorious queen’. It would have also prepared me for my new roles as mother/wife/domestic goddess. Nevertheless, as I always say, it is never too late to learn.
Anne Morrow Lindbergh’s “Gift from the Sea” has particularly made me understand my marriage, my ‘oyster bed’. “it is untidy, spread out in all directions, heavily encrusted with accumulations and in its living state…firmly embedded in its rock.” Although my husband and I are still in the early stages of our marriage, with two kids, a mortgage, educational plans, his career, my soon-to-be-realized-business, his family, my family, his friends, my friends, parent-teacher associations, we are slowly but surely accumulating affinities and encumbrances. Yes, we are in “the growing years of our marriage, struggling to find our place in the world.” Yet, I take comfort in the thought that Anne was particularly fond of the ‘oyster bed’ stage, despite its awkwardness, its unsightly appearance, its entanglements, it has a certain familiarity, a true symbol of tenacity and accommodation. This is the time that the bonds of marriage are formed. My husband and I may have outgrown the ‘gazing at each other’s eyes’ or ‘you and me against the world’ clichés, but they have been replaced by a much stronger, firmer web of love: love for our children, love for each other, love for our families, love for our community. Nevertheless, I also look forward to a time when I shall leave the oyster bed and move on to becoming an ‘Argonauta’, who are not fastened to their shell at all. A time when I, as a woman, shall come of age by myself.
As Anne looked to her shells for answers to the questions in her life, I have looked to the books I have read for enlightenment and a little guidance as well. When I was feeling dissatisfied and unhappy with the way I have let my career slip away from my hands, I read Anna Quindlen’s “A Short Guide to a Happy Life.” I, then looked more closely at my own life, and found it not lacking, but abundant in blessings: the smile on my babies, the soft bed I sleep in with my loved-ones, the cool, refreshing iced calamansi juice I make on hot summer days, my reliable husband, my wonderful mom, the laughter I share with friends. My life is full to the brim! And I am full of gratitude, sorrow is but a memory to me.
And so I make a simple plea to my fellow women. Find the time to read. For me, reading has been a saving grace from God. As I read and learn from these women writers, I find that my present situation is not so different from the others. That the dark nights when I sit alone and weeping was a place all women shared, at one time or another. And thus, I found reading their stories a refuge, a place to rest my weary soul, to gather my strength to move on and continue living. For life is glorious and it is ours for the taking!
"A great book is often such a midwife, delivering to the light what has been coiled like an embryo in the dark depths of the brain."
I found this entry in one of my old journals. I did not write where I got the quote and for the life of me, I could not remember either. (Whoever you are, thank you for writing it.)
I, for one, truly believe it. I love books! I love reading all kinds of books. My perfect day begins and ends with a good read. (I mean, isn't it obvious?)
But more than that, one of my deepest secret wish is to write one. Of course, you have to start somewhere, right. And one book is a good start. Now, if only I could decide what to write?
In the meantime, here's an essay I wrote, which, unfortunately didn't make it in print. Enjoy!
---
THE ESSENTIAL READING GUIDE FOR A WOMAN’S JOURNEY IN LIFE
Recently, I took a poll among my girlfriends. I asked them: “When was the last time you read something for pleasure?” One or two said “A week ago,” another said “Last month,” but most of them fall in the category, “I don’t remember anymore.”
Reading is such a luxury nowadays, at least, for us, women. Mothers, most especially. It does not matter whether one works in a corporate setting or at home, mothers, barely, have the energy nor the time to sit down and read a novel.
I remember, when my eldest child was just a few months old, I tried to finish “The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers” before the movie was shown in the theaters. (I have finished reading “The Fellowship of the Ring” when I was still pregnant.) I would pick up the book when he was taking a nap, read a few pages, put it down when he woke up to feed him, forget about the book until after he has slept at night, by then I could only read a few sentences because I was so exhausted from the day’s work.
For mothers like me, reading a book is an activity that is written at the bottom of our long list of to-dos, if at all. However, I believe it should not be so. In my opinion, one should not stop learning as we go through life, and thus, one should not stop reading. Yes, reading the newspaper headlines or the comics also count, but do not neglect “literature”: novels, short stories, poetry, essays.
Reading the classics, like Jane Austen’s “Pride and Prejudice” or Charles Dicken’s “A Tale of Two Cities” or Nick Joaquin’s “Manila”, often gives us a glimpse of the past, the roots of our society, of our human brethren.
Reading fantasy or science fiction books may sometimes tickle our fantasies about the future or a world created in the author’s imagination like Isaac Asimov’s “Foundation’s Edge” or J.R.R. Tolkien’s “The Hobbit”.
Reading gives us confirmation, imagination and revolution.
Revolution? Yes, there are books that inspire me, push me further in my explorations, dare me beyond the limits I have put on myself. These books create a ‘personal revolution’ inside me. They test my deep-seated beliefs about relationships, its temporal nature; about love, its constancy and mystery; about faith and the true meaning of our lives.
In my life’s journey, I have come to rely upon ‘a few trusted friends’, a few good books that I have always loved to read again and again, which have helped me, in one way or another, sort out my mixed-up feelings about motherhood and being a woman, or brought answers to questions I did not even know I was searching for, or opened new doors of understanding the world in which I live in.
Marianne Williamson’s “A Woman’s Worth” is a book I wished I had read when I was in my twenties, at a time when I was confused about my own worth, especially around men. It would have saved me from making a few mistakes about my relationships with men and other women. It would have reassured me that the struggle, the pain, was necessary in my evolution from a ‘princess’ to a ‘glorious queen’. It would have also prepared me for my new roles as mother/wife/domestic goddess. Nevertheless, as I always say, it is never too late to learn.
Anne Morrow Lindbergh’s “Gift from the Sea” has particularly made me understand my marriage, my ‘oyster bed’. “it is untidy, spread out in all directions, heavily encrusted with accumulations and in its living state…firmly embedded in its rock.” Although my husband and I are still in the early stages of our marriage, with two kids, a mortgage, educational plans, his career, my soon-to-be-realized-business, his family, my family, his friends, my friends, parent-teacher associations, we are slowly but surely accumulating affinities and encumbrances. Yes, we are in “the growing years of our marriage, struggling to find our place in the world.” Yet, I take comfort in the thought that Anne was particularly fond of the ‘oyster bed’ stage, despite its awkwardness, its unsightly appearance, its entanglements, it has a certain familiarity, a true symbol of tenacity and accommodation. This is the time that the bonds of marriage are formed. My husband and I may have outgrown the ‘gazing at each other’s eyes’ or ‘you and me against the world’ clichés, but they have been replaced by a much stronger, firmer web of love: love for our children, love for each other, love for our families, love for our community. Nevertheless, I also look forward to a time when I shall leave the oyster bed and move on to becoming an ‘Argonauta’, who are not fastened to their shell at all. A time when I, as a woman, shall come of age by myself.
As Anne looked to her shells for answers to the questions in her life, I have looked to the books I have read for enlightenment and a little guidance as well. When I was feeling dissatisfied and unhappy with the way I have let my career slip away from my hands, I read Anna Quindlen’s “A Short Guide to a Happy Life.” I, then looked more closely at my own life, and found it not lacking, but abundant in blessings: the smile on my babies, the soft bed I sleep in with my loved-ones, the cool, refreshing iced calamansi juice I make on hot summer days, my reliable husband, my wonderful mom, the laughter I share with friends. My life is full to the brim! And I am full of gratitude, sorrow is but a memory to me.
And so I make a simple plea to my fellow women. Find the time to read. For me, reading has been a saving grace from God. As I read and learn from these women writers, I find that my present situation is not so different from the others. That the dark nights when I sit alone and weeping was a place all women shared, at one time or another. And thus, I found reading their stories a refuge, a place to rest my weary soul, to gather my strength to move on and continue living. For life is glorious and it is ours for the taking!
posted by soulcraftwriter at 11:33 PM
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